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Wednesday, June 21, 2023

Deathbed Interviews, The Five Regrets of Life & Work From Anywhere -


A study from 2013.  Australian nurse interviews.

So, I found this article from 2013 - The top five regrets of the Dying.  

#1 - "I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize until they no longer have it."

Now, today, view this thought through the post-fear-of-covid, work-from-anywhere, lens.
  • 45-minute commutes
  • empty face-to-face meetings
  • irrelevant and ineffective managers
  • 2% raises after 'check-box' evaluations...
In her work as a palliative care nurse, Bronnie Ware encountered the dying epiphanies of patients in their final days. 

The most common regrets she observed are as follows:
  1. Living a life not true to oneself: This was the most common regret. People realized that many of their dreams went unfulfilled due to choices they had made or not made. Health, they realized, was a type of freedom, but this was often only understood when they no longer possessed it.
  2. Working too hard: Every male patient Ware nursed expressed this regret. They lamented missing their children's youth and the companionship of their partners. Some women also expressed this regret, but as many of them were not the breadwinners of their family, it was less common among them.
  3. Not expressing feelings: Many people suppressed their feelings to maintain peace with others, resulting in a mediocre existence. This often led to illnesses associated with bitterness and resentment.
  4. Losing touch with friends: Many people did not realize the full benefits of old friendships until their final days. In many cases, they regretted letting these friendships slip away due to being caught up in their own lives.
  5. Not allowing oneself to be happier: Many people didn't realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They stayed stuck in old patterns and habits, feigning contentment to others and to themselves, while deep down they yearned for genuine laughter and joy in their lives.

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